Birth Through Fire
by SouthernBell86
Summary: During the missing two years. What if Sydney was never kidnapped, and no one ever tried brainwashing Sydney but herself? Sarkney. Quite AU.
1. Rebirth

Disclaimer: I don't own anything having to do with Alias, not even a poster! It all belongs to JJ Abrams and Bad Robot.

Description: Yet another AU during Sydney's missing two years. What if Sydney was never kidnapped, and no one ever tried brainwashing Sydney but herself? Future Sarkney.

The sting of discovering your life long best friend is dead, and having to kill her body double all within the span of a few minutes still burned on her mind, in her eyes, and in her ears. When she went to sleep she could see the blood, heard the screaming, and her mind would race imagining what Francie had thought during her last moments. Had she known that it was Sydney's fault she was a target at all?

That had been three months ago, and ever since then she had been here, sitting in the dark hotel room she had gotten in Cuba. It was one of the last places the CIA would look for her. It wasn't like she had planned to run from them at first, she just thought she needed some alone time, but then, after one week had gone by she went online to read her first news paper, to be greeted with the site of her own obituary.

She wasn't dead, but she didn't feel alive either, so she had thought how convenient it was that they wouldn't be searching for her. Oh, she'd have to stay out of their way, but it was a lot easier to do if they thought you no longer existed. The only one she felt bad about was Will, who didn't understand any of it. Her Father and Vaughn both acted sad enough, but since she had been keeping tabs on them, they both seemed to be breathing heavy sighs of relief. Knowing her was very taxing, but not nearly as bad as being the Sydney Bristow.

People had been pulling her from all directions since the day she had been born. She had been in the middle of a Cold War battle, otherwise known as her parents.

For the last three months there had been no pulling. Sydney expected the people who faked her dental records and staged the house fire to call after the first month had gone by, but now she didn't know what to think. More than any kind of torture or mind washing experience she had gone through, the experience of hiding out to avoid alerting that you're not dead was, well, it was mind twisting.

Sydney started to question herself, question if she really was Sydney, or if she was really somebody else. Maybe she had been the one to start the fire and had inhaled a little too much smoke before exiting. Could that explain feeling Sydney Bristow's feelings?

As week went by week she stopped feeling anything but basic survival needs. Hunger, pain, fatigue, and after while she told herself that it was only in her strange swirling of feelings that she had confused the person she read about in the obituary with herself, with who she really was. She wasn't Sydney Bristow. Sydney Bristow was all things she wasn't, so much her very opposite that the thought of meeting Sydney almost sickened her, and at some point she squelched her mind so thoroughly that she wasn't even able to think of her name in any context.

The day after that total void of identity occurred, something new began. Deep within her psyche came up something that was the total opposite, someone who her mind told her that she could be, if she was defined as being Sydney's opposite.

And thus, Julia was born. No last name, just that one. She knew that she, Julia, was blonde, British, and nothing else. Right before Sydney slipped beyond oblivion, she put together an agreement with some old contacts, to cover up the last pieces of Sydney's life, and give Julia something to do. They called this agreement The Covenant.

A week later, her mind had filled in all the gaps in Julia's life, answered all the questions she had about herself. She even knew her last name, Thorne. It's all she allowed most employers and coworkers to call her. Thorne was less personal, less part of who she was.

That is how the real Sydney Bristow died, and her body and mind, though some say not her soul, created a new self. The soul wasn't involved in the process at all, it wasn't allowed to, for Julia had none, for she didn't know how to be Julia and have one simultaneously. Her mind had created this alter ego built on an image that Sydney had stored away as being her nemesis, her complete opposite.

That image was Julian Sark, and until now, he had never revealed to Sydney, the part of him that still had a soul.

A/N - I am okay with leaving this as a one-parter, but if I receive enough positive feedback I'll continue it. I know it's kind of cliche to write about the missing two years, because everyone has a spin on it, but well...this is mine! Wouldn't it have been so interesting?


	2. So it begins

Disclaimer – _I don't own anything Alias related and do not lay claim on it. This is just my idea of what could have been._

_A/N – Remember that Sydney has effectively brainwashed herself into being Julia Thorne, and created the Covenant. The Covenant has specific goals, put in place by Sydney, but which haven't been revealed at this time. Also Julia does not know what role Sydney played in the Covenant. I am not following the timeline of the missing two years, but borrowing certain events and casting aside others. _

_Please Review! It is much appreciated. Sorry for taking so long to update. I have been really busy, as well as not sure where to take this. Watching "The Bourne Ultimatum" put my mind back into the spy/Alias world. _

Julia smiled as she breathed the fresh air of Rome in October. It exhilarated her to be home again after her much needed holiday in Cuba. As much as she wanted to say she enjoyed herself she couldn't exactly place her finger on why she hadn't.

The trip was fuzzy and dark in her mind, much like so many other things in her life.

At least some good had come of the trip though, she had found a new employer, a mysterious one albeit, but one that seemed to be long term. She wasn't too sure how the Covenant had found her, but anyone who could trace her was worthy of her services.

Her first assignment from them was to take on a strange alias whom apparently had been killed. Apparently the resemblance was strong enough that she should be able to operate as a double agent within the deceased's old agency and insure that they would not bother the Covenant.

As Julia looked over the many photos of this girl's life, and read her file, she couldn't help feeling that perhaps the killing had been merciful. Though she had been recently engaged before her death, it seemed that her fiancé had moved along fast enough.

Preparing herself to go long term undercover as someone she had never met would be a bit harder than the quick and simple assassinations she was used to, but at least it would be interesting.

- - - - - - - -

Kendall stared at the blonde that sat before him and couldn't believe his eyes.

"Sydney, even after you called, I couldn't believe it was you. Explain everything, how are you still alive? Who took you?"

"Listen, Kendall I'm not sure about everything, this group they took me from the fire and they've had me locked up for a while now, I'm not sure how long," Julia let out a pained sigh to sound genuinely exhausted. "They tried to brainwash me, and are under the impression that they have been successful."

As she turned her head away with tears glistening in the corners of her eyes, Kendall immediately got a tissue and gave it to her.

Slowly wiping the tears away, Julia continued her emotional exposition, sharing all the details of torture and mind games, and paying particular attention to the use of the American accent she was supposed to be using.

Coming to the close of her story she looked directly at him and began asking her own questions. She had carefully planned questions that would be logical concerns of Sydney's, but would also be informative as to how she should proceed.

"How is Jack holding up? Did you tell him about our meeting?"

Kendall shook his head. "After the fire, he kept insisting you weren't dead, and went through your mother to try and prove it. At first we brushed it off as part of the grieving process, but he started to compromise our intelligence and cooperate with known terrorists against our commands. We had to arrest him." Kendall whispered the last sentence hoping Sydney wouldn't really hear it.

He had neglected to tell her that one of the terrorists was her mother mostly to avoid upsetting her anymore than necessary.

As waves of relief hit Julia, she put on a great show of looking hurt and confused. She could tell something was missing from this explanation, but it would suffice for now. She knew she needed to move on to the unfaithful fiancé.

"What about Vaughn, when can I see him?" Julia tried to inflect as much pain and desperation in her voice as she could.

"Vaughn took it pretty hard and decided to quick the Agency. As hard as it is, I don't think you should try to make contact." Kendall hoped Sydney wouldn't be stubborn for once in her life. "Let's try to figure out what your kidnappers want with you, and whether you can effectively take up being a double agent again."

"Quit the agency? Why shouldn't I try to contact him, he was my fiancé. Is my fiancé. He will be so relieved to know I am okay," she feigned shock as best she could. "I need him to get through this!"

"Sydney, I know how hard this will be for you, but obviously this new group is more powerful that we originally thought." Kendall shut his eyes, frustrated that he had revealed that he was aware of whom her captors were.

"Wait, you know more about these people?" Julia tried not to let the worry slip through her voice, and tried to mask it as hope. "How, how do you know about them?"

"I wasn't going to tell you this, I don't want to frighten you, but we think that they are after Rambaldi artifacts. We don't know what they have, but Echelon has started picking things up about a group called the Covenant, and some of our missions have been interrupted by them. We didn't know anything about them before you went missing."

Julia just sat with her head turned down and arms crossed. This was about as much as she expected them to know, but she wasn't sure why he thought Sydney would be frightened by Rambaldi collectors. She wasn't privy to all the details on the inventor, but obviously Sydney had known more about him, or been involved with other collectors.

"Rambaldi?" She asked with an exasperated tone in her voice. "You don't think…" she let her sentence drop off in one last bid for information.

"Yes, Sydney, I do think that Rambaldi has to do with it. I can't think of why else they would go so far as to fake your death when kidnapping you. I know you don't believe in the Prophecies, but there are a lot of powerful people who do," Kendall spoke the last sentence with a bit more tenderness than the rest. He realized how frustrated she must feel to be followed by Rambaldi at every turn.

- - - - - - - - -

Curled up in an arm chair with her mission report form Julia yawned out of exhaustion. She had only pretended to be Sydney for a few hours so far and she was already dreading the coming months of impersonating this woman. Even though her life had been far from ideal, the glance she had of Sydney Bristow's life made her thankful it wasn't hers.

_A/N – Okay, so if there is any confusion, Sydney now completely believes that she is Julia. The Covenant has assigned Julia to go undercover as Sydney whom Julia believes to be dead. Sorry there is no Sark yet, he is coming! _


	3. Instigation

Disclaimer: I own nothing having to do with Alias nor do I claim rights to it.

_A/N – Thank you all for the lovely comments! I am quite a busy girl so I can't promise that updates will come any faster, but I am working on other chapters. I quite enjoy writing this angle to her missing two years. Please keep telling me how you enjoy the story, and if there are any parts that need improvement, do let me know. _

**Reminder **Sydney has brainwashed herself into believing she is Julia, so all first person perspectives from Sydney will be from "Julia." Here comes some Sark! Irina is busy being elusive and mysterious right now, but she has a definite role down the road :) Enjoy!

Chapter 3 – Instigation

Sark had been laying low ever since he had managed to be freed from his CIA cell. Shortly after Irina's disappearance in Mexico City a few men had gotten him securely freed and had made no further contact since. While technically he did not know that it was Irina who had sent the men, there was no other logical person who would free him and not bribe him into cooperation. Not to mention that if it was her she wouldn't want to break cover for anyone at a time like this.

Not when Sydney Bristow had been killed shortly after Irina's disappearance.

A single piece of paper that said no more than "Sydney" in a plain black font was the only communication he had received from his liberators. As it was his only clue to why he might be free he had immediately researched every Sydney he knew, and tasked satellites over Australia to ascertain that nothing of importance was going on there. The only logical Sydney it could be, as he had originally thought, was the Sydney Bristow who had been killed in a fire just days before his release.

Sark was only happy that his release had been after that unfortunate event so that the CIA would not turn their search for her killer towards him. He actually figured it was some advantage to him that even though he was an escaped convict that he had an alibi for the night of her murder.

Even though Sydney was quite the formidable opponent he held no ill wishes for her, and was genuinely annoyed at whoever had disposed of her. Irina had always been quite clear of the consequences of causing any sort of permanent injury to Sydney. Sark supposed that some of that sense of protectiveness may have rubbed off on him. He realized he had become accustomed to the biting wit and quick thinking of the brunette and couldn't quite picture espionage without her. What good was searching for a hidden document unseen for hundreds of years if there wasn't the allure of seeing Sydney again and getting under her skin a bit, or trying to figure out which disguise she would be using next?

So as far as Sark could understand, Irina would expect him to discover Sydney's killers and destroy them and anyone of any relation to them beyond oblivion.

It wasn't as if it was a personal vendetta, but as he saw it it was his duty and what he owed Irina for all she had done for him. And the least he could do for her daughter.

So he began to keep tabs on all of Sydney's friends and relatives and the area near her house, checking for any unusual activity. He wasn't too surprised to see Agent Vaughn torn to pieces and mourning at a different bar every night. Agent Weiss didn't seem quite himself either, being more quiet and reserved, and rarely smiling. Will was still in the hospital recovering from the night of the fire. When he had come to consciousness a few days after her funeral he kept calling for her and didn't stop until Weiss showed him the pictures of Sydney's funeral. Then he didn't talk for days.

It was odd to see Jack Bristow so upset. He kept a stiff upper lip around the office but in the privacy of his own home it was as if he couldn't grasp the fact that Sydney was dead. He would look at pictures of her, and other keepsakes that reminded him of her and occasionally whisper "I'll find you" to the air around him. It seemed the elder Agent Bristow was still holding out hope that she was alive somewhere.

"I wish she were still alive too, Jack." Sark whispered to himself with a sympathetic tone.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------

Julia glanced around the large and dimly lit room with an expression of boredom. Though boredom was quite far from her mind at the moment, she had to admit that if it weren't for her mission this would be just about the most boring club she had ever been to.

There were almost no decorations, only a few tables and only untalented local artists being played. Even the drinks were bad from what she could tell.

That was what led her here in the first place. A club that is horribly managed, gets no business and yet somehow manages not to close generally sticks out in Paris.

Her task was to track George Walden, an arms dealer who had recently tried to contact the Covenant in order to establish a business relationship. As he was known to frequent this place Julia had decided to stake it out and get what information she could.

Just when Julia was beginning to think that she would need to leave and come back another night, a small man of no more than five feet walked through the door. He greeted the doorman with an air of familiarity and sat at the opposite end of the bar where the bartender already had the man's favorite drink prepared for him.

As the man drank his drink Julia noticed a scar on the back of his left hand and above his right eye, as well as the misshapen look of his nose. All of these things seemed to indicate that he was the right guy.

As she stood up to approach the man a tranquilizer dart flew towards the man and hit him squarely in the neck, knocking him out cold. Julia quickly scaled the bar and ducked behind it while trying to locate the shooter.

At times like this Julia thought to herself that it would be nice to bring back up, but as it was she had none and so she decided to thwart the attacker's plans. As she saw a masked figure walking towards Walden she shot the chandelier overhead in perfect timing to land on him before he could duck. After that she used one of her own darts to shoot him to ensure he would be out of it for a while, and then Julia stayed in place for a few minutes while she listened for his back up, if he had any.

After five minutes without anyone coming to his rescue Julia slowly walked towards him while scanning the room again. When she got to the masked man she leaned over and pushed the chandelier out of the way, rolled him over and placed his hands and feet in cuffs. She then rolled him into a sitting position and kicked him in the leg to awaken his senses.

As he woke up he tried to move his arms and legs only to realize that he had been caught. The man looked up to Julia with awe and fear, because even as carefully as he had planned his mission, she had managed to get the best of him, as beautiful women often did. Seeing the chandelier lying on the ground he realized his mistake of walking under something that could render him useless.

"Stand up," Julia demanded of the man who still wore his mask. When he didn't budge Julia kicked him again, but this time in the other leg.

"Okay, okay, I'm getting up, just don't kick me anymore or I won't be able to walk."

The man spoke with a carefully unaccented voice. To Julia that meant that he still held hope of getting away from her before she discovered his identity.

Once he was on his feet Julia looked at him, face devoid of emotion.

"If you try to escape from me, you will not live to regret it. The cuffs you are wearing on your hands and feet are equipped with three kinds of poison that will be released into your bloodstream if you try to take them off or if I use the remote control."

The man nodded his head and then in a slight Cockney accent replied, "I'm all yours then."

"Good, as long as you cooperate there shouldn't be much more pain involved for you."

Keeping her gun trained on the man, Julia then went over to Mr. Walden and stood him up with her other arm.

As she got the short man into position to be carried out she motioned with her gun for the masked man to walk ahead of her. They walked in silence for the better part of a mile as Julia directed the man with her gun. They approached a black van that Julia quickly opened the doors of and strapped Mr. Walden into a seat.

With her gun pointed into his back, Julia removed the handcuffs temporarily and replaced them quickly so that his hands were in front of him.

As she did this the man could smell her hair and skin and thought she was the loveliest captor he had ever had. It didn't matter what her demands were now, he would meet them gladly.


End file.
